When Barbie Met Ken, I Met God

     When I was young I enjoyed all things girly, but Barbies and dollhouses were by far my favorite because I got to create and direct and act.  Oh how my imagination would run wild while playing!  I sometimes find myself wishing I could go back to watch my little creative self in my own magical world of make believe.  I remember reenacting dramatic, intense scenes with Barbie and Ken; Barbie accidently falling out the 2 story window of their dream house, and Ken heroically grabbing her hand to save her from her macabre death just in time. 


     That Ken doll though! He was handsome and charming and sophisticated and brave; basically like taking every Disney Prince and shoving them all into one flawlessly perfect dude.  Seriously Disney?  How could any real life guy live up to that??  Sorry, that could be enough to fill an entirely different post for some other day! Anyways, he somehow always knew the exact moment that Barbie needed him the most and he would of course stop everything he was doing and come running to his one true love.  And, let's not forget the most important thing!  They always, always, lived happily ever after...although, "ever after" for me at that time usually meant just for that day only, because by the next day I would have crafted a new storyline filled with even more obstacles for the both of them.  It was as if Barbie was the star in her very own PG-13 (back in the 90's that rating was still fairly innocent, no dirty thoughts people!) daytime soap opera series.  Lol.  There would be babysitting drama, 2 Ken dolls fighting over her, sister issues, red convertible car crashes, etc.  By the way, I'm seriously starting to wonder if I should have become a screenplay writer or film producer now.  Hmm...do they take interviews with grown-ups who act out their scenes using Barbie dolls though? ;D


     My bad, back on track!  I guess the reason I decided to write this blog post was because I wanted to remember that little Heather's world for just a moment.  After all, even my Blogger title partly pays some tribute to her.  I do believe that young girl helped form the grown-up me in more ways than one.  Even then I knew in the back of my head that there was no such thing as a perfect family, they all had ups and downs.  If I had to psychoanalyze my younger self, I would guess that the reason I spent so much time playing make believe was due to the fact that my own perfect family had somehow ended up broken and torn apart.  No matter how hard that younger me cried, prayed, or wished on stars, I couldn't fix it.  It was all out of my control.  However, I could create crazy drama with Barbie and Ken and safely know that at the end of the day they were still together, no matter what.  I could control that much.

 

     I wish my present self could go back and hug that shy, fragile, little Heather and tell her that it would all be okay, and then I would have to thank her.  I would thank her for still believing in true love, even after witnessing her own parents' heartbreak.  I would thank her for not losing hope, because not all relationships end with pain and sorrow.  I would thank her for her amazing imagination, because without it she would've had no escape from the worries, confusion, and sadness that she felt.  I would thank her for allowing herself to cry and be vulnerable, because crying is good for the soul and it helps to let things go.  I would thank her for her persistent, repetitive prayers and her absolute trust in the faithfulness of God; although they went unanswered, solace was found in His unfailing love and compassion.  The way I see it, young Heather endured so that I might come out on the other side and count it all joy.  God has showed his perfect, unending love for me in so many different ways.  It's only now that I am older that I can truly understand that, especially in times of suffering, He is always there: giving comfort, strength and the hope that it will all pass.  The sun will shine after the storm; praise Him while you are in it and he will guide you through it.
 

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." -James 1:2-3

"Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." -Romans 5:3-5

     My God is the King of all Kings, and only His love is whole and perfect, none can compare! I am so blessed with the amazing life that He has given me.  I love my parents so much, and I am so thankful to have a good relationship with both of them.  They are the reason I am here and they planted the seeds of faith in my young heart so that one day I might come to know God's love.  For that, I will always be forever grateful because I can now proclaim, "Count it all joy!"  

    

    

Turning 30

To quote the Lost Boys in the movie Hook, "We wanna be like Peter Pan, we don't wanna grow up!!

    
     I'm sitting here in bed wide awake and I just had a stare down with my clock hoping to somehow force it to stop at 11:59pm so that I could magically stay 29 forever.  This has been a tough week mentally.  The last couple of days I've been upset, nostalgic and somewhat of a crybaby.  I've watched some childhood movies like Hook and Disney's The Little Mermaid...also the other 2 Little Mermaid movies which I never knew about or saw, don't judge me.  Lol.  I got on our computer and hunted down video clips of me with my babies when they were actually babies, and I also kinda looked like a baby.  I've sat and thought about all my birthdays through the years and not any of them made me feel like I feel now.  It's hard to describe.  I know people say that your 30's are the best and that it's something to look forward to, but my 20's were pretty great and I don't know if the 30's can compete with that.

     
     I didn't have the average, wild, early 20's like most people. There was no "away at college" life or hitting up clubs or getting tattoos or even much drinking for that matter.  Nope, my 20's journey didn't involve those things and I'm really glad they didn't because this past decade of my life was spent starting up our little family and then watching it grow into a rather large family.  So while most 20 somethingers were nursing bad hangovers or pulling all nighters studying or maybe even taking their early morning walk of shame, I was learning how to be a mom.  When I look back at my 20's I can see myself falling in love with each of my baby boy's precious little faces as I hold them for the first time.  I can see myself walking down a church aisle towards a handsome, angel of a man whom I didn't even feel like I deserved; this amazing person who is looking back at me like I'm the only person in the entire room.  I tear up just picturing the memories, each one all so perfect.
    
     No one ever told me that when you turned 30 your life would flash before your eyes...seriously though, that would have been helpful because I may have thought I was dying several times this week.  So...am I depressed I'm turning 30?  No. However, I am annoyed I'll be acquiring wrinkles and gray hair now, ugh.  I'm not sad that I'm turning 30 because I know my next decade is going to bring some pretty awesome memories too.  I truly do feel blessed.  So here's to you my amazing, crazy busy, wonderful, lively 20's; thanks for the last 10 years!!  So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye because I really need to be going to bed now...for real, it's not like I'm in my 20's anymore.  ;)

Busy Summer Days!

     This summer has been craaazy so far!  Jes got picked for All Stars baseball after the regular baseball season ended (yay.) Lol! I know...I am a terrible mom for thinking that way, but I came from an all girls family and this sports stuff every weekend, sometimes multiple times a day, plus practices during the week?? Ugh! I gotta say I thought Jes would be overwhelmed, but he has baseball on the brain 24/7 and loves it.  When he is not playing or practicing he is outside with Dad throwing the ball back and forth.  Phillip does most of the taking to and from practices so I can't complain too much there.  I am most likely being overly dramatic and whiny, but I'm the only chick in this house so sometimes it happens.  Plus, I am the one who has to Shout Out the stains on those uniforms and bleach his WHITE baseball pants all the time. Anyways, I can always count on Phillip to keep me in check, and he has reminded me several times that "it's not all about Heather". LOL.

     Last week was VBS for our church and also another church that I have sent the boys to for the last couple of years.  So in the morning they went to a Presbyterian church for a couple of hours and then to our Baptist church in the evening.  That meant I only had 2 children during those 5 hours everyday that week.  I really REALLY like VBS week! ;D 
No but seriously, it plays a HUGE part in children's lives, and I really admire the people who devote their time to setup these programs so that kids may come to know Jesus. I still remember getting saved when I was younger at VBS, and that moment wouldn't have occurred if it wasn't for VBS and the people that volunteer to help.

     So when I went to pick Jes up one evening I couldn't find him, then his teacher told me he was at the front of the church speaking to someone about Jesus.  I had the proudest, biggest, momma smile ever!! Every mom worries and stresses (especially me)...am I raising them right?  Am I being a good enough mom?  And then knowing that Jes took those baby steps of faith by himself (my first born baby!) it was as if God was telling me yes, you are! Soo getting teary eyed while typing this...lol.  It was an overwhelming feeling and an incredibly happy moment so I just had to share it!

Easter Weekend

We mostly spent Easter weekend outdoors and the weather couldn't have been better.  Grandma came to visit and take part in all the Easter activities with us. We grilled some burgers after church, ate eggs and chowed down some candy.

Jakers found this big ole frog with 3 and 1/2 legs

I think he's the animal whisperer...this lizard was literally attached to Jake, I've never seen anything like it!

Joey giving Jude a speedy wagon ride

Baseball ready

Joe Joe cuddling up to Grandma

Hah! He makes the craziest man faces

Joey loved dying eggs

Jake is the artist in the bunch

I was sad to find out that Jes wasn't as thrilled to dye eggs as he was last year...boys grow up too fast!

See what I mean? I can guarantee that I wasn't blow drying my own hair at his age. He's 7 going on 17

My guys all spiffed up for church

I really wish I would've taken a picture of the mess that they left all over my floor and table when they devoured all the eggs without my permission.



All done hunting eggs, and check out Matthew McConaughey Jr. with his bandanna to keep his hair back, lol.

Such excitement on his face...he was over it.

Daddy and his lil buddy

Shheeese!!

So precious...when sleeping. ;)

Monkey face!

HAHAHA!

We made a paper boat since all the rain made our yard a pond.

Saw this after leaving Jake's practice

And he got his first stripe!

   

Joey's Birthday!

3 years old!

He's a blinker just like his momma!

Joey loving on his Aunt Meg

Mammie had to hold them both to avoid some jealousy here, lol.

     My sweet, little chubby-faced Joe Joe is 3! Thank goodness he still has those cheekers because it becomes all too real when those go away and turn into a more mature face.  It's very bittersweet!  But the funny thing is (even though I still get emotional with each birthday) I am starting to grow up more myself and I realize that with each year the boys are getting smarter and more independent and showing more of their individuality.  They have some similarities, but mostly they are coming into their own and figuring out the kinds of activities they like and it's really fun to see this. 

    Jes of course loves outdoors, playing with friends and is a sports fanatic; always some kind of ball in his hand. Jake likes riding his pocket rocket and is very into his jiu jitsu class.  Joey has mastered all of our electronic devices and he likes for me to read to him lots.  And Jude is a climber; can totally see him climbing Mount Everest in the future. Lol! So I guess instead of being sad like I use to be when their birthdays came and went, I'm now really looking forward to it.  I also think that means I've left the young mom phase behind; not even close to wise mom stage (I imagine that comes after you've successfully seen one kid through adolescence right?) yet but I'm somewhere in the middle and it's kinda comfy here. 

     One thing I am not comfortable with is potty training...ugh.  I really really hate it.  I am a girl and they are messy little boys and it's all gross.  I know I should be an expert at this point since the older two have done it all but that's just it...it was by some miracle that they finally decided to go on the potty.  I remember trying EVERYTHING with Jes, charts and stickers, candy, lots of praise, I even let his little naked butt run around thinking he'd be more willing to use the potty that way; only to find out he was more than happy to pee pee and crap on the floor.  Joey knows how to pee on his little potty but has not gone number two at all on there, so you can imagine how fun cleaning underwear has been over here.  I seriously told Phillip that if I could pay someone to take my child for a month and get them potty trained for me, I'd do it in a heartbeat.  Haha!  Someone needs to start that up for real; a potty training boot camp for toddlers. 

Little pool sharks

I went to grab a flashlight and up he goes

I dunno how he squeezed in there, lol.

They play so good together now

Playing catch with Dad

First day of jiu jitsu, all proud wearing his gi!

Good-bye 2011

     Wow!  Isn't it odd that when you're a kid you can never really envision yourself being in the future?  I mean I knew that I was going to grow up and become a pediatrician, marry a handsome man equivalent to Barbie's boyfriend with awesome hair (see below), and have some daughters. Lol! So...1 out of 3 ain't so bad; even though my Ken doll refuses to grow his hair out!  Time seems to go by slower when you're little though and of course when you hit 18 it all flies by in a blur. 

Yes, I had this exact one back in the day

     It's insane to me that I've known Phillip for over 10 years now!  I don't feel old at all, even though we'll both be knocking on 30's door pretty soon.  Hah!  So anyways onto this year's resolutions...yes plural; I have many this time around and I kinda wanna take them seriously.  Normally I don't like sharing mine cause then I run into that annoying moment when someone says, "so how are you doing on such and such?" then I stumble over my words until I admit my laziness and lack of motivation.  I hate that.  And majority of the time the one doing the questioning is that I-do-everything-perfect-because-I'm-awesome person. Lol. I am rolling my eyes just thinking about it. Ok, I'll stop being negative now.  This year I am informing people because I actually want to accomplish my resolutions.

     The first one is to get back to a weight that makes me feel good. Not any particular number, just more confidence in myself.  Second one is to read the Bible daily.  I am a reader, I love to read, I should be reading the Bible daily, but I never do and I don't have an excuse not to.  Third one is to stop being a scaredy pants little girl and join some kind of women's group.  It can be a mommy's getting together with the kids thing or signing up for a group at church, but either way I need more grown-up interaction.  Fourth one is a tough one for me and that is to stop being a "potty mouth", as people here in Mississippi call it.  I have been doing better but I still slip up sometimes, especially if I stump my toe or accidentally make a huge mess by spilling or breaking something in the kitchen. LOL!  Fifth and final goal is to have more patience cause I seem to have none and I don't like being dubbed "monster mom" or "bleep-y". ;)

     There they all are!  Feel free to ask me about them and see how I'm doing, hopefully I won't wig out on you when you do, haha! J/K!  Happy New Year!

A Merry Little Christmas

     We had a nice, relaxing Christmas and it was perfect! Since we have lived in Mississippi for 6 years now we've gotten use to it being just us enjoying the whole day together. We miss seeing our family, but I do not miss rushing to get ready then running from one place to the next while trying to divide up time evenly. It always ends up with someone upset and that completely voids out the purpose of Christmas. So I guess I've come to prefer spending Christmas day at home and I think that is a tradition that Phillip and I will most likely keep no matter where we move to in the future since we both agree it works best for our family.

Seeing Santa at Bass Pro!

Chomping down some Christmas sugar cookies

Super excited to open presents

Jesse loves Transformers

Jude is a big time Daddy's boy

Dad and his boys shooting stuff

Jude dude climbing on his Christmas present

Future Mavericks basketball star

Jake is the new sheriff around these parts

Joey on his new motorcycle

Jes taking his new pocket bike for a ride

All set and ready to race