When I was young I enjoyed all things girly, but Barbies and dollhouses were by far my favorite because I got to create and direct and act. Oh how my imagination would run wild while playing! I sometimes find myself wishing I could go back to watch my little creative self in my own magical world of make believe. I remember reenacting dramatic, intense scenes with Barbie and Ken; Barbie accidently falling out the 2 story window of their dream house, and Ken heroically grabbing her hand to save her from her macabre death just in time.
That Ken doll though! He was handsome and charming and sophisticated and brave; basically like taking every Disney Prince and shoving them all into one flawlessly perfect dude. Seriously Disney? How could any real life guy live up to that?? Sorry, that could be enough to fill an entirely different post for some other day! Anyways, he somehow always knew the exact moment that Barbie needed him the most and he would of course stop everything he was doing and come running to his one true love. And, let's not forget the most important thing! They always, always, lived happily ever after...although, "ever after" for me at that time usually meant just for that day only, because by the next day I would have crafted a new storyline filled with even more obstacles for the both of them. It was as if Barbie was the star in her very own PG-13 (back in the 90's that rating was still fairly innocent, no dirty thoughts people!) daytime soap opera series. Lol. There would be babysitting drama, 2 Ken dolls fighting over her, sister issues, red convertible car crashes, etc. By the way, I'm seriously starting to wonder if I should have become a screenplay writer or film producer now. Hmm...do they take interviews with grown-ups who act out their scenes using Barbie dolls though? ;D
My bad, back on track! I guess the reason I decided to write this blog post was because I wanted to remember that little Heather's world for just a moment. After all, even my Blogger title partly pays some tribute to her. I do believe that young girl helped form the grown-up me in more ways than one. Even then I knew in the back of my head that there was no such thing as a perfect family, they all had ups and downs. If I had to psychoanalyze my younger self, I would guess that the reason I spent so much time playing make believe was due to the fact that my own perfect family had somehow ended up broken and torn apart. No matter how hard that younger me cried, prayed, or wished on stars, I couldn't fix it. It was all out of my control. However, I could create crazy drama with Barbie and Ken and safely know that at the end of the day they were still together, no matter what. I could control that much.
That Ken doll though! He was handsome and charming and sophisticated and brave; basically like taking every Disney Prince and shoving them all into one flawlessly perfect dude. Seriously Disney? How could any real life guy live up to that?? Sorry, that could be enough to fill an entirely different post for some other day! Anyways, he somehow always knew the exact moment that Barbie needed him the most and he would of course stop everything he was doing and come running to his one true love. And, let's not forget the most important thing! They always, always, lived happily ever after...although, "ever after" for me at that time usually meant just for that day only, because by the next day I would have crafted a new storyline filled with even more obstacles for the both of them. It was as if Barbie was the star in her very own PG-13 (back in the 90's that rating was still fairly innocent, no dirty thoughts people!) daytime soap opera series. Lol. There would be babysitting drama, 2 Ken dolls fighting over her, sister issues, red convertible car crashes, etc. By the way, I'm seriously starting to wonder if I should have become a screenplay writer or film producer now. Hmm...do they take interviews with grown-ups who act out their scenes using Barbie dolls though? ;D
My bad, back on track! I guess the reason I decided to write this blog post was because I wanted to remember that little Heather's world for just a moment. After all, even my Blogger title partly pays some tribute to her. I do believe that young girl helped form the grown-up me in more ways than one. Even then I knew in the back of my head that there was no such thing as a perfect family, they all had ups and downs. If I had to psychoanalyze my younger self, I would guess that the reason I spent so much time playing make believe was due to the fact that my own perfect family had somehow ended up broken and torn apart. No matter how hard that younger me cried, prayed, or wished on stars, I couldn't fix it. It was all out of my control. However, I could create crazy drama with Barbie and Ken and safely know that at the end of the day they were still together, no matter what. I could control that much.
I wish my present self could go back and hug that shy, fragile, little Heather and tell her that it would all be okay, and then I would have to thank her. I would thank her for still believing in true love, even after witnessing her own parents' heartbreak. I would thank her for not losing hope, because not all relationships end with pain and sorrow. I would thank her for her amazing imagination, because without it she would've had no escape from the worries, confusion, and sadness that she felt. I would thank her for allowing herself to cry and be vulnerable, because crying is good for the soul and it helps to let things go. I would thank her for her persistent, repetitive prayers and her absolute trust in the faithfulness of God; although they went unanswered, solace was found in His unfailing love and compassion. The way I see it, young Heather endured so that I might come out on the other side and count it all joy. God has showed his perfect, unending love for me in so many different ways. It's only now that I am older that I can truly understand that, especially in times of suffering, He is always there: giving comfort, strength and the hope that it will all pass. The sun will shine after the storm; praise Him while you are in it and he will guide you through it.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance." -James 1:2-3
"Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." -Romans 5:3-5
My God is the King of all Kings, and only His love is whole and perfect, none can compare! I am so blessed with the amazing life that He has given me. I love my parents so much, and I am so thankful to have a good relationship with both of them. They are the reason I am here and they planted the seeds of faith in my young heart so that one day I might come to know God's love. For that, I will always be forever grateful because I can now proclaim, "Count it all joy!"
